Let me be close. A desire for symbiosis in the face of impossibility, infatuation, intoxication.

One has had insight into the ways in which one does not get along with one’s beloved subject. You know the pitfalls and feel the many situations that can prove that good wishes were never enough. This on the one hand and on the other hand the love and the knowledge that we are only here in the world for a limited time. One says to oneself: “Despite everything. On another level, in another reality we belong together.” One wants to dare the blasphemous and let this other reality become real, knowing that this can only exist for a short time.

Note: I have made the following music selection for myself. It may therefore appear to you (the reader) to be unsuitable for this structure, because it’s personal criteria.

Proximity through a jointly agreed lie

On the level of love and intimacy, one does not get along with the beloved subject. Therefore, on this level one distances oneself and tries to convince the loved one to have a union on a physical level.

Manna (feat. Ville Valo) – Just For Tonight
Nomi Ruiz – White Horse

Proximity through the weights of gravity

It’s as if heavy weights are pulling you down into this other reality where you are essentially and intimately interacting with the beloved subject. The closeness can only arise where the pain is felt, where you meet where there is no questioning and debating. Where the other person is taken for this time as he or she is. This is the way into the lower direction of symbiosis, into the world of weights. The weights are in this case the own abandonment wound which one wants to feel together with the beloved subject, so that one leads the beloved being to where no one else is allowed to be.

Sufjan Stevens – Fourth of July
Bob Dylan & Patti Smith – Dark Eyes
Ria Gill – Do Dreamers Dream for Nothing? (self written monologue)

Closeness by impregnating myself and meeting you upstairs

The other kind of symbiosis leads to the detachment, to the dissolution around losing oneself and thus to enable a contact with the loved subject who is detached. As if under the intoxication of drugs, one then feels liberated from oneself. You feel that you are suddenly amused or delighted by things that you previously perceived as absurd and negative in the other person. You meet on a childlike level and get close to each other there.

Psychic TV — Good Vibrations

I want to live our love, even if it doesn’t work out

Another kind of symbiosis leads through loyalty to the crash. One remains faithful to the beloved subject although one perceives and knows that it is a path into the abyss on which one will go many small steps further and further and one feels connected by this common path.

Elvis Presley – Suspicious Minds
Nomi Ruiz – Life or Cream

Let me show you just how little we have in common.

“I’ll show you exactly how little you can satisfy me and how little we fit together to lead you into the traumatic realization of our differences.”

Revelation is produced excessively and creates a counter-polarity, whose symbiosis is revealed in an obscure way by a difference that is conceived as being in separation. Explanation of this: Contrast makes it possible to see an object (here: the beloved subject in an objectified way) more precisely. By making differences visible, the beloved subject can only be made out as an individual in a mere mass of the same and own. “He is different from me, that’s why I love him” In this way the symbiosis is recognizable, because if you are always of the same opinion, it feels (with regard to the desired symbiosis) as if there is no counterpart.

David Usher – Black Black Heart

Note: Music is free and the assignments made here are for entertainment purposes only and can never restrict a song to only these aspects.

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